Bock's Office http://www.bocksoffice.com The Ticket to Your Success! Sun, 05 Mar 2017 17:08:00 +0000 en-US hourly 1 We’ve moved! http://www.bocksoffice.com/weve-moved/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/weve-moved/#respond Fri, 27 Jan 2017 13:53:03 +0000 http://www.bocksoffice.com/?p=1295 Our blog has a new home! While we are proud of the content here, and we will keep the posts up, our new content now resides at www.invitetothewhite.com Please check us out there for new and updated content.

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Our blog has a new home! While we are proud of the content here, and we will keep the posts up, our new content now resides at

www.invitetothewhite.com

Please check us out there for new and updated content.

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You are the boss of you http://www.bocksoffice.com/you-are-the-boss-of-you/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/you-are-the-boss-of-you/#respond Fri, 16 Oct 2015 12:57:09 +0000 http://www.bocksoffice.com/?p=1209 And I am the boss of me. But I am not the boss of you. How is it that every little kid in the world has, at some time in his or her little life, uttered the words “YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!”? Where does that thought even reside in the collective consciousness of […]

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And I am the boss of me.

But I am not the boss of you.

How is it that every little kid in the world has, at some time in his or her little life, uttered the words

“YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!”?

Where does that thought even reside in the collective consciousness of our 5-year-old selves?

It probably still occurs to us as adults, once in a while, when we hear someone else tell us what we “should” do or lets us know in no uncertain terms, what needs to get done right now (homework, dishes, jury duty, TPS Reports, etc.).

True. I’m not the boss of anyone, even if I, technically, am the boss.

How does it work to “make” someone else do something? You  may get a short-term result, but you’re sure not forging a relationship.

So while you can’t make someone else change, you are the boss of you. And I am the boss of me.

What that means is that if I want something other than what I currently have, the only way that will ever create a long-term effect is if I am inspired to take new action.

And there, my friends, is the rub.

Looking at the big picture of us as a human species, we don’t seem to be very inspired to take the action that, over time, will produce different results. This graphic shows that only 2% of us choose to live outside our comfort zones and live the lives we have every opportunity to live.

2 percent mindset

For some reason, many of us seem to be stuck in our reasonable lives – we have reasons for everything we do or don’t do – and our destinies are left to someone or something outside ourselves.

While we rant and rave about how “you’re not the boss of me,” we’re left directionless because it seems the only boss who can control us has decided to take a permanent coffee break. Instead of growing out of our comfort zones, we fight tooth and nail to stay in our limited existence and then complain because that comfort zone doesn’t produce what we see the 2% – the “bosses” get to have, do and be.

It’s time to wake up and smell that proverbial coffee. If you’re not the boss of me, and you’re not the boss of you, is it any wonder that you’re in the situation you’re in?

Wake up, take charge, and really live your life.

Like a Boss.

 

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That Nasty Little 4-Letter F Word http://www.bocksoffice.com/that-nasty-little-4-letter-f-word/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/that-nasty-little-4-letter-f-word/#respond Tue, 04 Aug 2015 13:27:11 +0000 http://www.bocksoffice.com/?p=1195 The word to which I refer this time is FEAR. Fear. What an interesting concept. You can’t touch it or smell it or taste it. Yet it’s running most of our lives and producing many of our results without our even knowing it. Think for a minute about anything you’ve ever had a notion to […]

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The word to which I refer this time is FEAR. Fear. What an interesting concept.

You can’t touch it or smell it or taste it. Yet it’s running most of our lives and producing many of our results without our even knowing it.

Think for a minute about anything you’ve ever had a notion to do, be, or have. How many of those desires came true? Determine the distinction between those that did, and those that didn’t. What’s the difference?

I’ll bet, if you’re honest, and after you drill down through a few layers, the underlying instigator that has prevented you from really living the life of your dreams is that nasty little 4-letter F word: FEAR.

In the dark, everything has the potential to be scary. Our imaginations have a tendency, when they are out of the light of day, to dip to the lowest and worst possible scenario. I think that’s because, without outside influence, gravity takes over and pulls things down.

Where did this succumbing to gravity come from? When we were little kids, we were fearless. We’re born one big gleaming ball of love and somewhere along the way we learn fear.

We don’t need to go back and rehash how we got here … it’s enough to say that we’ve learned over time through our subconscious programming to be skeptical – even cynical – and fear-based.

How’s that working? Might there be another way to see the world at the core of our beings? What if we got back to our original existence and started consciously looking at things through the eyes of love instead of the eyes of fear?

Awareness is surely key to making any kind of shift. So just noticing where your cynicism and resignation has taken up residence is the first step.

It’s possible to reprogram our software, even if it’s been set where it is for a long time. It’s possible. I have no idea how probable it is – that’s an individual decision.

Will you wait until the pain of changing becomes less than the pain of staying the same? Does it have to be a shift away from what you don’t want or might there be an opportunity to shift toward what you do want before the breaking point?

I’d love to discuss the possibilities with you. If you’re interested in learning about the shifts that are possible when you’re ready to transform yourself or your business, let’s talk. Send me an email (jodee@bocksoffice.com) with RECHARGE in the subject line and let’s see what we can discover. Together.

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Being or Doing? http://www.bocksoffice.com/being-or-doing/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/being-or-doing/#respond Sat, 11 Jul 2015 19:14:31 +0000 http://www.bocksoffice.com/?p=1187 Action defeats procrastination. That’s pretty difficult to dispute. However, busyness is not the same as productivity. So therein lies the dilemma. To do or to be? If the busyness we find ourselves captivated by prevents time for reflection, then it becomes reactionary instead of responsible. And it’s unlikely that very many of us have the […]

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being-vs-doing2

Action defeats procrastination. That’s pretty difficult to dispute.

However, busyness is not the same as productivity.

So therein lies the dilemma. To do or to be?

If the busyness we find ourselves captivated by prevents time for reflection, then it becomes reactionary instead of responsible. And it’s unlikely that very many of us have the opportunity to spend our entire days in solitude and meditation. Too much of any one thing keeps us from being well-rounded.

Nature has a way of regenerating itself through the process of evolution. Nothing is static in nature. If it’s not growing, it’s dying. So as humans, part of our nature is to grow and develop.

The entire natural process is about growth, but inside the growth are cycles of rest and recovery. So by embracing that cycle as what is, we can be silent when it feels right to be silent, and vocal when that’s the best choice. All of the contrasts are perfect when we can view them as a crucial part of the whole.

So doing is one part, but being is an equal, if opposite, part.

Notice the upsets and frustrations and allow them to signal resistance to what is. When those signposts show up, look for the alternative instead of staying stuck.

Be an active part of the doing and you’ll discover the joy in the journey.

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Who are you and what do you want? http://www.bocksoffice.com/who-are-you-and-what-do-you-want-3/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/who-are-you-and-what-do-you-want-3/#respond Tue, 16 Jun 2015 15:45:43 +0000 http://www.bocksoffice.com/?p=1150 Steve Farber is one of my favorite authors, and in his first book The Radical Leap he shares a story about one person who is trying to reach another person by phone. When the phone goes unanswered, the answering machine picks up and this is what it says: Hello. You may think this is an […]

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Steve Farber is one of my favorite authors, and in his first book The Radical Leap he shares a story about one person who is trying to reach another person by phone. When the phone goes unanswered, the answering machine picks up and this is what it says:

voice mail

Hello. You may think this is an answering machine, but it’s not. It’s a questioning machine. And I have 2 questions for you: Who are you? and What do you want? Now before you think these are trivial questions, just consider that very few people ever find the answer to either one. Beeeeeeep.

Wow. Simple but profound.

Who are you? and What do you want?

Ponder those, friends. And know that when you discover the answers for yourself, you will be stepping into a realm of self awareness that few people do. And that’s when things will begin to shift for all aspects of your life.

A bold claim? Maybe. What do you have to lose by stepping up and stepping in?

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Comfort Zone or Familiar Zone? http://www.bocksoffice.com/comfort-zone-or-familiar-zone/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/comfort-zone-or-familiar-zone/#respond Tue, 12 May 2015 13:47:48 +0000 http://www.bocksoffice.com/?p=1128 Most humans are comfort-seeking creatures. We tend to move toward that which is most familiar and makes us feel most secure. Yet we also know that growth happens outside our comfort zones. And humans are the only species that actually goes against nature to avoid growth. We work extra hard to avoid having to change, even […]

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Most humans are comfort-seeking creatures. We tend to move toward that which is most familiar and makes us feel most secure.

Yet we also know that growth happens outside our comfort zones.

And humans are the only species that actually goes against nature to avoid growth. We work extra hard to avoid having to change, even though all of nature is pushing us in that direction.

Henry Cloud has written an amazing book called Necessary Endings which gives a blinding glimpse of the obvious for anyone who has ever done everything possible to avoid making a change, especially as it relates to relationships, and then determines something’s got to go.

Endings are just part of the process, and always lead us to new beginnings. Yet many people stare so long at the door that’s closing that they forget to look at the one that’s opening.

If we’re honest, we will have to admit that our comfort zones are no longer comfortable: we’re outgrowing them rapidly. They’ve now become only familiar, and that familiarity really can breed contempt.

If change is inevitable and growth is optional, which will you choose? Remember the wise words of Henry Cloud:

“We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.”

Choose wisely.

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What’s Your Story? http://www.bocksoffice.com/whats-your-story/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/whats-your-story/#respond Thu, 09 Apr 2015 12:46:55 +0000 http://bocksoffice.com/?p=1108 We all have a history (or HER story). That’s what has happened in our lives. It really is just what is. On the other side of that, we have our version of what happened. That’s usually at least a little bit different from what actually happened, because it’s what we’ve seen – or remembered – […]

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We all have a history (or HER story). That’s what has happened in our lives. It really is just what is.

On the other side of that, we have our version of what happened. That’s usually at least a little bit different from what actually happened, because it’s what we’ve seen – or remembered – about that history.

In most cases our version of that history has migrated over time so that our version, at least in our minds, becomes what actually is.

As a speaker, I often use stories from my past to illustrate points I’m making. As I think about those stories right now, I don’t even know that I remember the specific incidents I talk about; I just remember the story I tell about the incident. And, I admit it here, I may have embellished the story to better prove my point. And now, that story has become my recollection of what happened.

How often does that occur in all of our lives? Our memories become our story. And the stories change over time to better prove whatever point we’ve wanted to make in order to be right.

My story – from as far back as I can remember – is “They won’t let me.” And my entire life has been shaped by that context. And it’s not even true. Sure there were some times that that probably was remotely possible. But over time, probably even subconsciously, I’ve been able to use that as an excuse for not playing as big as my life calls me to live.

Byron Katie is a brilliant author who has formulated what she calls “The Work,” which she highlights in her book Loving What Is. The work is four questions:

1. Is that true?

2. Can I be absolutely certain that is true?

3. How do I react when I believe that it is true?

4. Who would I be without that thought?

How would your life shift if you examined the stories you tell about your life? Since your future will be a lot like your past unless you change it, now is a great time to wake up and see where things are heading.

We all have a story, but we are not our stories. Although you can’t rewrite the beginning, every day you have the opportunity to ensure a happy ending.

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Exclusive or Inclusive? http://www.bocksoffice.com/exclusive-or-inclusive/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/exclusive-or-inclusive/#respond Mon, 30 Mar 2015 18:08:46 +0000 http://bocksoffice.com/?p=1105 I had a great conversation this morning with a colleague and I got thinking about the word “Exclusive.” As a marketing term, that seems to be what you would want for yourself or your organization. After all, don’t we want to be stylish and fashionable and available to only the very best of the best? But […]

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I had a great conversation this morning with a colleague and I got thinking about the word “Exclusive.”

As a marketing term, that seems to be what you would want for yourself or your organization. After all, don’t we want to be stylish and fashionable and available to only the very best of the best?

But according to Webster, the other definitions of the word EXCLUSIVE include limiting or limited to possession, control, or use by a single individual or group; being snobbishly aloof; and shutting out all others but those designated.

Now certainly there is a time and place to be exclusive. If you’re creating a birthday party for someone and the cake is designed exclusively for that one person, that’s awesome. How special will that one person feel!

But if we’re being exclusive in our communication or our invitation or our thinking about anything we’re creating, we’re not being inclusive. And that hurts.

What do you do when you feel excluded from a conversation or an event or a meeting? Do you lash out? Do you push your way in? Or do you retreat?

Often exclusion is a result of fear. And we most likely don’t do any of this on purpose. We’re subconsciously afraid that if we allow others who are different to participate, we might find out we weren’t “right.” So we hold on tightly to our exclusivity and hope like everything that nobody breaks our boundaries.

But … what if love is bigger than fear (and it is)? Then what?

He drew a circle that shut me out –
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle and took him in!

From the poem “Outwitted” by Edwin Markham

Where might you be holding on to something that you might be better off letting go? Where might you be exclusive instead of inclusive?

Draw a bigger circle and see what happens.

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T.H.I.N.K. before you speak http://www.bocksoffice.com/t-h-i-n-k-before-you-speak/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/t-h-i-n-k-before-you-speak/#respond Wed, 25 Mar 2015 03:42:22 +0000 http://bocksoffice.com/?p=1093 In our part of the world (the Upper Midwest), we tend to be really nice. In fact, they’ve named a condition after us: Minnesota (or North Dakota) Nice. And that’s not always a good thing. According to an article in the Star Tribune, there are some really not-so-nice things about being Minnesota Nice. So, while […]

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In our part of the world (the Upper Midwest), we tend to be really nice.

In fact, they’ve named a condition after us: Minnesota (or North Dakota) Nice. And that’s not always a good thing.

According to an article in the Star Tribune, there are some really not-so-nice things about being Minnesota Nice.

So, while we’re hesitant to rock a boat or ruffle a feather, at least to the person’s face, we can actually be downright nasty behind someone’s back.

So next time you notice yourself falling into the Minnesota/North Dakota Nice trap, here are some great tips, reminding you to T.H.I.N.K. before you speak: to or about someone.

T – Is it TRUE? Would you allow yourself to be quoted making the statement or being the source of the question?

H – Is it HELPFUL? Will it lead to a solution to a problem?

I – Is it INSPIRING? Will your words build someone up?

N – Is it NECESSARY? Should you speak up or keep quiet?

K – Is it KIND? Are you words sincerely intended to help and support the person or the situation?

Just THINK about the difference you can make when you are purposeful about your communication!

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Fill ‘er up! http://www.bocksoffice.com/fill-er-up/ http://www.bocksoffice.com/fill-er-up/#respond Thu, 26 Feb 2015 19:38:59 +0000 http://bocksoffice.com/?p=852 You’ve heard the story about filling other people’s buckets, right? You dip from your own well of experience, ideas, love, compassion, or whatever other positive stuff is in there and you use it to fill other peoples’ buckets so they can do the same for others. If you intentionally give away the positivity you want, […]

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You’ve heard the story about filling other people’s buckets, right? You dip from your own well of experience, ideas, love, compassion, or whatever other positive stuff is in there and you use it to fill other peoples’ buckets so they can do the same for others.

If you intentionally give away the positivity you want, you will realize in the giving that you already had what you were looking for.

However, the unspoken truth is that you can’t intentionally fill someone else’s bucket with awesomeness if there is no awesomeness there to give.

And the reality is that once in a while, if we don’t intentionally do something to fill our own buckets because we are waiting for someone else to do it for us, we might come up empty.

What do you do that fills your own bucket?

And, even more importantly, are you aware of the probably many times a day that others are working to fill yours up and you’re not receiving? If the lid is on your bucket and someone is trying to pour into it by giving you a compliment or holding a door open or any of the many, many little things you might not even notice, you’re losing out on ways to get your own bucket replenished.

Of course, there will be times you just need to unplug and go where you can get big doses.

Do you have a place you go to refill your bucket? Is it a physical place? Or is it being around certain people?

Please share your ideas and let’s begin a personal bucket-filling brigade so we can continue to spread awesomeness wherever we go!

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